“You are enough”

What is enough?

I think we have been conditioned to believe that ‘enough’ is a precise point which sits between ‘not enough’ and ‘too much’, and it’s a place that so many of us are desperate to reach. We spend time and effort adapting our behaviour, worrying that we are not yet hitting that elusive ‘just right’ sweet spot, and, if by chance or by design we reach it, doing everything we can to ensure that we stay there.

Authenticity is one of the highest frequencies we can vibrate at, yet we are turning our dials down because we think we need to be more acceptable to some, and forcing ourselves to turn them up far past a point of comfort, so that we can be appealing enough to others.

And yet still we are told “you are enough”. We don’t always feel it.

Has this become a throw away phrase, dished out because people want to appease a situation or make someone feel better?

Ironically, the word ‘enough’ in itself makes me feel not so! As though, I’m just about sufficient, but nothing more. As if all of the exceptional, outstanding parts of me have not been celebrated.
As if my challenges have not been recognised.

I understand and appreciate the sentiment behind “you are enough” but wonder if we would be better if we curated an individual phrase suited to the individual and circumstances instead. “You are enviably calm”, “I’d love to have your discipline”, “Your passion and excitement for this is admirable”, “I love the way you show people that you care”, “Your enthusiasm is contagious”.

Would it be better if we never assessed our ‘enoughness’, and focused on authenticity, individuality and just ‘what is’ instead?

PS – If you want some more guidance and to ponder on the big questions in life, why not check out the Philosopher-in-Residence series. Out every fortnight on a Thursday, and written by our Principal Planner, Anna Pascoe.  You can take a peek at the latest edition here: BEING AUGUST - Make Me A Plan